Last days as a teenager

gash!! I am already 19 and will soon be 20!! I hate growing up.. seriously I wish I could continue being 19 for the rest of my life. But thats the way life goes. The other day, I was talkin to Mr.N and Mr. BS as to how I might recount my days as a teenager, once I become old enuf.. And suddenly I was obsessed with this thought that I had to do something crazy b4 i turned 20. All my life, I have taken the safest route coz I was.. afraid of taking risks.. was weary of treading the dangerous paths. And now, deep down in my heart, I do regret it.. In retrospect, I feel that I enjoyed my life, more in my junior college than in my school. Those two years were like heaven for me, something which I had not experienced till then. Now, my heart longs for those days.. Just met some of my old intermediate friends durin the week-end.. had a lot of catching up to do.. Learnt tht A and M had joined TIME, whereas P and R were fervently preparing for GRE. Recounted some of the old incidents and laughed my guts out.. Had not laughed like that for quite some time..

Things are not looking up on the assignment front as well.. Hav not touched any of da assignments nor hav i started any project work.. This sem zulu's surely gonna burn me at the stake, but somehow I am happy with whats happenin in my life.. hav seen tougher times.. and theres always something new and funny to look forward to when one wakes up in the morning.. hav been doin lots of inspirin lately and guess what?? Mr. N and BS seem to have got my point and hav joined my bandwagon of doin somethin crazy.. But they hafta hurry up.. for time is runnin out.. For me.. I am oblivious of the impending danger which I'd be facing durin the end sems.. hav not listened to many classes durin the sem and wud be faced with the uphill task of startin from the scratch.. But surprisingly I am not panickin yet.. Feel as if I have gone into this state of transcendental bliss.. Sometimes wish we had no grades.. no CGPA system.. no foes.. no grudges.. the loose cannon in me wants to be let out, but i m holdin on.. i dunno for how long.. am reminded of the lyrics of My December..

and i give it all away
just to have somewhere to go to
give it all away
to have someone to come home to

this is my december
these are my snow covered dreams
this is me pretending
this is all i need